Yesterday I got a very good passing score on a certain DoD test -- I will leave the details of exactly which test it was unsaid, since I am told that divulging too much about it would be unwise -- and now all that I have dreamed of for the past 4 (5?) years is about to come true!
I have been obsessed with this one thing for so long that it has become essentially who I am -- what I study in all my free time, what I dream about at night, what I talk about to everyone around me... and now it's going to actually happen!!!!!
The night before last, I could not sleep for all the anticipation and worry about this test, and this night I drink (vodka shots and screwdrivers, so far, lol) in celebration! The test yesterday was by far the hardest test I have ever taken, and it drained me utterly, and when I got back home all I could do was sleep from sheer exhaustion (exhaustion mostly from my nervous anticipation). When I woke up, I had a huge smile, because I am actually going to do it!
It will be hard... so hard, I know I don't even comprehend it at this point. They will train me literally for years. In a couple of years... a dream will have come true, all expenses paid, even a salary, and my only directive will be to maintain discipline and study my ass off.
I find that something happens every couple of years in my life... I go for a couple of years absorbing my surroundings and studying and growing, and like clockwork, when I become bored for about a year, I make a dramatic leap and everything changes. This clockwork change and growth, I hope it stays with me all my life. The biggest challenge of my life so far is about to begin, and I can hardly wait!
Soon, very soon, everything will change. Guaranteed. I scored high enough on that test that every option is open to me. Time to live the dream, baby!!!!!!!!
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